May 13, 2008 (11:13pm)

May 13, 2008 (11:13pm)

You know that the littlest smile or the soft voice of your children and the I love you, Mom  and I need to tell you something or I just need to see you watching them together sharing and laughing and telling the dreams of their lives and how much that they need you in their lives no matter what the past was like or what you were or what you did and the little time that you have had with them in their lives to this point it never seems to over take the need of their mothers’ love. They have forgiven you and still love you and need you in their lives forever. Then you finally think you have your children and nothing in the world can change that. Your life is perfect. The everyday calls the simple I love your mom or I need to see you or can we talk. I never want another day without you For Really Forever Mom! Them sharing their heart aches and their smile and the secrets of their hearts with you. Their lives are so perfect with you in it regardless of what is going on in their personal lives. Nothing can take it away after a wonderful day with them 19 and 16 you realize that you wished you had done things right many years’ ago causes these times are so precious to live without. Then, we will be right-back, and we love you. Awakening to the sounds of police radio and that knock on the door. You know the one that you never want to answer. Cause then you will know that the precious memories of their final few months and only a few tears of their whole life and some pictures  are all you have left. Once you open that door. To get the fatal news both your sons were killed in a horrible wreck and there was a fire and you cannot even see them. Sounds like a horrible dream huh but the truth is it happened to me. The anger the pain the rage and the lose of not one but two young lives are gone and I cannot ever have the dreams we shared and the plans or even the simple I love you, mom For Real! And their  beautiful smile. Are gone forever?