Awaken

Awaken

Written by: Ramona Coulter

5-24-07

Today I awaken the deeper parts of me.

The ones that no one ever sees

Open the breath of the unknown.

Many words form as the memories unfold.

Tears swell up

My throat closes shut.

Who now can I really trust?

For now the wounds are raw and weak.

As they are ripping my heart;

 Right out of my chest.

Long nights with demons of my past 

Seem to forever last.

“Tick Tock -Tick Tock;”

There goes the clock.

Please God!

“Let the nightmares stop.

Take away the daddy’s 

That hurt little girls.

Making they grow up,

To be no more, than whores. 

Take away the nights

 That I fought the pain 

As he ripped

 My innocence away.

Take away the beatings and cussing I got, because I was his little whore for the night.

Take way the shame and guilt I feel because all his love for me was a demented thrill.

 Now as the memories arise: all I can do is cry.

For today I see my life just a number to the state.

 Not even a wife.

Just a slave to the dope 

Not a mother any more

My daddy’s prediction no more than a whore.

Anger whelms and overloads my mind.

I hate you ###### I hope you die!

How could you be so cruel? 

I was just a baby, it started at two.

Never ever will I forget you’re the bastard that I let win?

Not Today! I want you to know you rule nothing.

 My God is holding my hand and he runs this show.

 I will not be a victim to, or your sick games.

I am standing and taking back my life.

You know what I am worthy to be a wife.

I got what it takes to be a mother.

Now I can trust and have friends that really matter.

I am eager to live today I also don’t ever and have to ever be afraid.

For I am Ramona

I love me today.