Feeling Your Pain

I look at you and feel your pain.

I know your agony and your shame.

I know the war you battle within.

The way your heart cries out to Him!I 

See the doubt of confusion plaguing your mind,

While you give in one more time.

In the shadows of the night 

depression creeps in your mind.

The past comes to life , 

all the excitement and glamorous highs.

Rewind! Rewind! 

Once again

To the places of our darkest sins.

You go there to cover you pain.

To take back and reclaim.

To be the one that your really not

To fit in at all cost.

Wear the mask you know so well.

The struggle with anger comes without warning.

Deeper into the darkness down you go.

Still thinking you can live this way and grow.

To this day it has never happened.

The darkness over takes depression creeps in.

Who am I kidding I can’t win!

Now your fighting your self again

Peer pressure come from every corner. 

Your imagination and the game plagues your mind.

I can do it a few more times.

This is one battle you can’t win.

You need “Him” by your side.

Stop pushin away and running to hide.

No matter how far you go, 

You can never get away from the 

“Son”; you know

Cause through His blood this war was won.

Even for you my little one!

It takes one thing “a Choice only you can make.”

Open up be your self_ change your mind

Spread your wings with Grace and Pride.

Your awesome as a Butterfly!

For He is the answer for you and I .

Lets take his hand .

Jesus Christ will set us free!

 WEJUST HAVE TO

 BELIEVE!

Happy Birthday Devon eugene Coulter

missing you on your specail day It been 5 year today
mommy loves you devon i want you to know even
when i had to let you go
I know your happy and loved
and one day you will see the love i have for you
that it took to make you safe and free.

MY THOUGHTS OF THE DAY

Today I have so many feelings.
 I feel the pain of my past the ones that I cause, and the ones others; cause to me.
I see how my addiction affected everyone around me.
I want to humble my self to forgive.
To ask for forgiveness and move forward.
I see all the changes going on around me and within my mind body and soul.

BOW MY HEAD TO PRAY

The time has come now my friend.

I' m finally free the sins of my past.

I humbly bow my head to say,

Forgive me Lord, take the pain away!

Remove the sins from my yesterdays,

As I bow my head to pray.

I thank you Lord for showing me,

the way out of the darkness

into the light.

Freeing my from the demons of my past.

As i bow my head to pray.

I give Glory to you Lord 

for letting me know

 all the treasures I truly hold.

Giving me the choice to love and forgive  myself .

As I bow my head to pray.

I appreciate the choices given unto me 

To give back what was so freely given to me

To help others though their pains of their past.

To let go and love and be free at last 

Just  as you have done for me 

As I bow my head to pray.

I realize all you have done for thee

You Son was given to set us Free!!!!

How Dare You

The dreams become real.

The screams inside explode.

How dare you?

She's my heart and soul.

Moons and laughter.

Giggles and stars.

Push me higher,

 Mommie!

Milky way kisses 

Patty cake hugs

Yes, My angel 

you're the one 

Mommie loves

Where do you go from here?

Where do you go from here?

By Ramona Coulter

June 11, 2008

Where do you go from here?

 Looking back it is all a dream.

Unimaginable and unexplained.   

Not knowing what to do. 

Why did it end so soon?

When you were given one more chance to

 To be the Mother they needed so.

Then out of the blue Jesus took them both. 

In a blink of an eye you’re lost again.

Where do you go from here?

All you have are memories of their final days.

When you were the mother they needed for

 So long.

They forgave you from the bottom of their souls.

They were so happy you were there.

 Nothing anyone said mattered anyway.

You’re their mother and that will never change.

They prayed for you all these years to protect

 you and to show you the way back

 To them, Even for just one day.

It did not matter to them.

 All they need was time to say

Mom we can’t live without you another day.

Where do you go from here?

They got the chance to have their say and then

God took them away to the heavens up above. 

All the little things you’ve missed

The times lost in the past.

 Can never be done again?

No more I love you or time to share?

Where do you go from here?

As you begin another day,

 Without seeing their precious faces.

Remember where you use to be.

 Why God let you see just for a little while,

 What they needed you to be.

So while you go on through your days

 Remember their smile.

Remember the way they loved you

even through your hardest days

when you were not there to be

The mom they needed you to be.

But Remember you got the chance,

To make it right and clear the past.

Now you got their final days

In your heart they will” Forever”  be.

For one day you will see them again.

Walking hand and hand in the heavens above.

 Forever you will be!

All you got to do is stay sober and free

From the life you once knew. 

Then your final Dream will come true.

See you know where to go from here.

Toe Tag

Toe Tag

By: Ramona Coulter

August 12,2007

 Toe tag read,” Jane Doe”!

She laid there lost and all alone.

Another victim lost to the Game.

In the ditch was where she was thrown.

“No Regards” ,

She was a mother or had a family at home.

Just because she chose this life.

 To be a prostitute instead of a wife.

To be a dope fiend instead of a mother.

The mention of her death did not even matter.

No one even cared about her pain .

The agony.

The torture or even “Her Name”.

On the side of the road was where she laid .

Lost and all alone out in the rain.

No one even cared how this came about? 

Who were the ones that hurt her and threw her out?

How many days did she lay there lost? 

Why was death her final cost?

 Every things jumping once again.

On the corner were it all begin. All new faces lost and alone.

 Which will be the next Jane Doe to go home?

Note; Who cares? Do you Care?

I am the voice for the Lost.  I Care!